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Crazy?
By RabidX


Rating -G
Summary - Fred reflects (ok so it was almost 'Fred does some thinking' but that's Janete's!) after the whole Billy thing.
Pairing: Fred/Wesley Improv #32: roll -- cracker -- stupefy -- chunk
Disclaimer: Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy own these people. I just enjoy psycho-analyzing them. No harm, no foul, no money.
Spoilers: 'Billy' AtS season 3 Notes: Yeah, another 'what is Fred thinking' after the hellish crap Wes did. Couldn't help it. It fell right out of my brain! God, I loved that episode! And thanks as always to my Beta, Wyrdchaos! My Sister in Sin! As always, you help me figure shite out! (lurve lurve lurve)

~ ~ Thoughts

She wonders sometimes if it's worth it. If all her actions, well reactions if one was to be completely honest, meant a thing. Wonders if, just one time, just this one time, she won't roll with the punches. If just one time she will just freak. Well, worse that she did before. Much worse than she did at the bus station. Much much worse than she did in her whole time in Pylea.

Can she even begin to consider what a normal life is like anymore? She had one back home in Texas. Even if she was way too brainy for everyone. Way too busy reading big textbooks and enjoying math class. Way too brainy for even the simplest of dates, never mind homecoming or prom. Way too brainy to be swept up in the whole state of Texas' love of high school football. No, her life was never normal simple, just... simple. Simple and happy. Not simply terrifying or simply hideous.

She looks around the huge lobby of the hotel. Cordelia and Angel are sharing one more small smile and joke over something. Gunn is cleaning a huge sword of demonic goop. Occasionally he tosses an amused look or quip at Angel and Cordelia. And Wesley is...

Avoiding her. Reading a huge, dusty tome in his office. They both have done a lot of that in the past few days. Walked carefully around each other. Made sure there was always someone in the room with them. It was getting stupid really.

It was not his fault. Period. Yes, she was freaked. Again. But she got over it. Again. Wesley isn't the terrible parody of a father figure/jealous lover he'd become. He was gentle and smart and quiet. A girl would be crazy not to snatch him up.

Oh yeah and she was crazy, wasn't she? Cracker crumbs in bed kinda crazy. All itchy and small and nearly invisible except they made you itch.

That made her giggle, earning a quizzical look from the other three. She shrugged and tried not to crawl back under the table again. Five years was a big enough chunk of her life spent hiding in dark places, thank you very much. Five years of tears and hopes that never came true until the White Knight came and took the Princess away.

~Wow, Winnifred, really need to do some mental spring cleaning. Time to get the cobwebs out and dust off the medulla oblongata. That would be nice. If everyone could open their heads and just let all the bad stuff get washed out. Kinda got swept up in the moment , didn't you? Angel is not your White Knight and Cordelia is the Princess around here.~

And now that wasn't so bad. It had been a lovely fantasy to hide in. All shiny and hers to look at whenever she wanted. But life, real life, was turning out to be much more interesting if violent. Heck, she could deal with the violence. She was even dealing with forks again.

Wesley let out a sigh none of the others notice. She goes to his office door and peeks in, watches him stare at his dartboard like it holds all the answers. He looks so drawn and tired. She used to rub her father's shoulders when he got that look. Rub them until he patted her hands and said 'Thank you, puddin'. She's pretty sure Wesley wouldn't like that. Or call her 'puddin'. Would he?

She pads in on quiet feet. Wesley doesn't even notice until her hands are on his shoulders. He turns his head and his eyes get wide. She just smiles and kneads away, working on the knots. Eventually, he relaxes and hangs his head a bit.

"Fred... oh that's... nice...er..."

"Thanks. Cordelia has the power to stupefy men with her looks, I use my hands." She chirps.

Wesley snorts. "She does, doesn't she? But I wouldn't say your only powers of stupefaction lie in your hands."

She blushes, glad his back is to her, his head down. Glad too that he's not pulling away or stammering some sort of excuse. Glad that the pit of her stomach is feeling sorta fluttery and warm.

"Um. Would you like to maybe go see a movie? There's some wonderful things playing at the IMAX." He says, his voice a whisper.

"I... I'd like that. Haven't been to the IMAX yet. Can... can we go maybe tonight?" She desperately doesn't want to break this feeling. If either of them has a day to think on it, they would both run away again. Run and hide and hope everyone else will....

"Of course." Wesley sits up, turning to smile a bit shyly at her.

Oh wow. Maybe she wasn't that crazy after all.